Four Precious Years

Here we are, celebrating our wedding anniversary after only four years. It seems we have been together longer but as I reflect on all of the memories, my heart is overwhelmed with gratitude. Marriage is such a priceless gift. Our relationship has been difficult many times but the lessons learned cannot be learned elsewhere. My husband is surrendered to the Lord. He seeks His will for our marriage and family. Are we perfect? Far from it! But we are redeemed and we are being sanctified daily, many times through the struggles we encounter together. I love you more deeply each day, my love. Thank you for blessing me with your true self. Your smile, your laughter, your affection, your mistakes, your apologies, your silliness, your manliness, your sincerity, your work ethic, your fathering skills, your humility, your compassion, your drive, your heart of worship…YOU… and all of your intricacies fill my life with joy!

Above all else...

Guard your heart; for it is the wellspring of life. ~Proverbs 4:23Two months have passed since my last post. Life has been full of joy and sorrow. Our faith has been tested and our love strengthened. Our marriage has, once again, undergone some open-heart surgery. The incisions are far from being fully healed but we are under the care of the Almighty God. Aaron and I are finally beginning to see the power of spiritual discipline; the power of the Holy Spirit to work through His Word and prayer ro strengthen our union. We strongly believe, as a visiting pastor from Ecuador said today, that strong marriages create strong families, which in turn, create a stronger society. (it sounded better in Spanish:) I have learned through this trial that marriage is always worth fighting for. I have learned, once again, that my covenant with Aaron is for a lifetime. My commitment to him on our wedding day is one that I shall willingly hold on to until the day that I die. He is my Lord's gift to me. Although at times, I am tempted to view this gift from a wordily perspective and measure its benefit to me, love is to be much more than what is reciprocated. With God's help, my love for Aaron must reflect the love described in 1 Corinthians 13… Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up;  does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil;  does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth;  bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.No matter what I do and no matter what Aaron does, our commitment is "for better or for worse." I ask God to strengthen my trust in Him, so that I can live this out when it becomes difficult. I ask Him to guard my heart from pride and thinking as the world does. And tonight, I ask God to help me not to behave rudely towards my husband. He needs my respect even when I don't feel he deserves it, even when he hasn't earned it. Am I a doormat? That's the way the world thinks. God is not calling me to allow abuse. He is calling me to encourage my husband; to stand by him and cheer him on; to help him up when he falls; and to be perfectly content and satisfied in Christ, so that my husband receives the overflow. I have often found that when I am depending on Aaron to meet my every need, something happens to remind me that he is not called to do that. Neither of us are made to do that. We just finished the Art of Marriage in a small group venue. It was so rewarding to participate in this intimate setting. The biblical truths resounded in our hearts once again and the wellspring flowed freely within us. The rekindled flame in our hearts towards God and each other has trickled down to our little guys and the amazing family time we have had with them lately. I hope to always be brought back to this place of complete surrender. It's storming in our lives once again but the Prince of Peace stands with us. 

Look Up

I intend to continue to use this blog as a journal of the lessons I learn in submission. If it blesses one person besides me for writing it out, it will be worth it. However, I have moved away from social media for a couple of weeks now because my dear husband and I had a discussion about how it was affecting us. I want to live in the real moments, hear about others' joys in person, or if they are far away, over the telephone. I no longer want my sons to watch as I "look down." I want to look into the eyes of my handsome husband as often as I can. I want him to know he has my undivided attention. I want to do the same with our precious boys. There is not enough time in a day to read everyone's posts and see everyone's pictures and enjoy the friends, family, and even strangers around me simultaneously. I would rather be in the moment than have everyone wait a moment while I check my social media. I'm not judging you but my decision was confirmed when a dear friend of mine sent me a link to this video…

http://://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z7dLU6fk9QY

His First Prayer...

So Eli prayed aloud before lunch today, without any prompting. He said "Jesus, thank You for this day, for this pasta, AMEN!" I almost cried. The thought of our son acknowledging God is amazing to us! Until now, our prayers have been almost routine, similar at different times of the day. Although he often wants us to hold hands to pray at random moments, he has never actually prayed out loud. Aaron has a painting of a father kneeling at his son's bedside while he sleeps. In the window you can see a mighty angel fighting off a demon. The painting is called "Spiritual Warfare" by Ron DiCianni. Such a powerful depiction of what actually happens in the spiritual realm when we pray! Eli loves this painting. The other day, he knelt beside it and said "That's my Dadda. He's praying." Oh, that his little heart would be tender towards God! As he learns to communicate with our Heavenly Father, I pray that he learns to hear His voice, and that he remembers to intercede for others as well. Almost every night, when Aaron leads our family in prayer, he not only blesses us, he calls upon the God of the Universe to protect and guide us, and to prepare the hearts of our boys for Him. He is also teaching them the simple humility of bowing before our Mighty God and submitting to His will for our lives. Thank You, dear Jesus, for my husband, who is learning to submit to You, and in the process is leading our family!

Value Your Relationship

Pride goes before destruction,
    and a haughty spirit before a fall.  

                                  Proverbs 16:18

I read a post today that said: Apologizing doesn't always mean you're wrong and the other person is right. It means you value your relationship more than your ego. 

In the quarrels and disagreements we often have with others, it is our pride that is at the root of our attitude. In my experience, I often think to myself, "I am not apologizing! He hurt me!" Silence can be deadly to a relationship. Our anger or hurt can sever a relationship if it goes undealt with. It may seem easier to escape instead of humbling ourselves and apologizing but a fall may soon follow. Even when I am not the initiator of the argument, my attitude and my reaction can be hurtful to the other person. My apology can bring life, soften the heart of my loved one, turn their heart towards God. Just as the forgiveness I have received in Him has drawn me closer, so the power of forgiveness works between two people. When I think about my husband and the times we have been in conflict, I am humbly reminded to value him and our precious relationship, rather than pridefully hold on to whatever anger I am holding onto. 

Testing 1…2…3...

As I shared with my husband what a joy it was to be testing students, he celebrated with me and affirmed me with kind words! We are to be one another's biggest fans. Not idols, just cheerleaders! Hebrews 10:24 says "And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds" Are your words and actions motivating your spouse to be successful?

Built up in Him

"Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him, rooted and built up in him and established in the faith, just as you were taught, abounding in thanksgiving." 

COLOSSIANS 2:6-7 ESV

Therein lies my worth, I am rooted and built up in Him, established in the faith. So I am called to thankfully walk in Him. As I meditate this morning on what that entails, I am reminded of my constant dependence on Him. I fail often but that does not define who I am. In Christ, I am made righteous, holy, set apart, a new creation. I am constantly bombarded by condemning thoughts that I will never be good enough or that I am capable of the worst. I am aware of my humanity. However, I am now rooted and established in Christ. I am covered by His precious blood. Every vile thing I have ever done, was paid for and forgiven. Separated from who I now am. Thank You, my precious Lord. Through Your death, I have received forgiveness. Through Your resurrection, I have new life! "My life is worth the living just because He lives!" 

Homeschool Evaluator

"As unto the Lord.." In submitting my will to the Lord, I am no longer teaching in the public school setting. I am teaching our two-year-old every day while we play and explore the world together. What a joy it is to be home with my boys! Aside from being a wife, this is my highest calling and I do not take it lightly. We have come to a point, that in order to make ends meet, I need to work to supplement our income. Thanks to encouragement from my friends, Jamie and Anne, I have begun offering homeschool evaluations and services. The doors just keep opening so I am obediently walking through them! My Jesus is so faithful in answering prayer. If you find yourself resisting the Spirit, stop. He loves you tremendously and wants your life to be lived abundantly. I don't believe that translates into financial wealth. I do believe He wants you to experience His peace, His joy, His fulfillment and His presence.
If anyone knows of homeschooling moms or dads in need of an evaluator in Hillsborough, Pasco, Pinellas, or Hernando County, please have them contact me. 

He had a dream…

The Lord seems to speak to my husband in dreams. Before he met me, he had a dream about me. This was written 1 year before we met… 

Tuesday, May 30, 2006 

letter to a mystery woman where do i begin? well i'm thinking about you, i seem to do that alot. i wonder what you look like, what you sound like, what you smell like, what you taste like. i have visions of your silhouette like God is giving me a hint as to who you are. i think your soul collided with mine before God created us. sometimes i think God never fully separated us when he created us, like i have a part of you already. i wonder if i'm on your mind as much as you're on mine. i don't even know who you are yet, but i find myself tangled up in you. i often wonder how i will know i've found you. i guess i'll know when i find that light in the darkness that is my mind. there are some things i do know about you. i know your smile will light up my world, i know your touch will ignite a million emotions in my body, i know your laugh will ease the pain of every last lonely moment, i know that when we do meet, God will be taking two lives and weaving them into one, and until then, i'm comforted by the fact that your never further away than a dream. So the Lord saw fit to unite us as one four years later! Since then, we have grown spiritually, and in our relationship to one another. We had excellent pre-marital counseling, using the book, "Preparing for Marriage" by Brent Nelson. Six months into our marriage, we attended Family Life's "Art of Marriage" event. We were a part of a small group at our church with other young married couples, and one older couple who mentored us all in spiritual parenting. In my husband's heart was a dream to share what we learn along the way with other couples. In fact, our passion for making marriage a priority became both of our dreams. We began a marriage retreat in Pennsylvania with 5 couples in 2012. It was such a blessing that we had another one in the summer of 2013. For our three year anniversary (while I was eight months pregnant), we attend "A Weekend to Remember" Getaway Conference.  As we are learning that marriage is to tell the truth about who God is, and it is a reflection of Christ's love for the church, living it out in our marriage is inspiring us to continue to minister to other couples. This past weekend, along with our friends, Josh and Katie, we hosted our first "Art of Marriage" conference. It was amazing to see this dream become a reality! If you sense God wanting to use your dreams to minister to others, take the step of faith and trust Him to walk you through it! We were delighted to see couples who had been married only a year, to others who've been married over 25 years blown away by the simple truths in God's Word. Aaron and I have gotten closer through this journey. The time we have spent in prayer and preparation has helped us be more patient with one another and to love each other more deeply.  This morning, Aaron told me he had a dream about a friend of his who passed away a few years ago. He said that it shook him up to think that life is so fragile and it is inspiring him to be more loving to others. Sometimes I just stare at him in admiration. I am aware of his flaws. As I am aware of my flaws as well. Nonetheless, he is my dream come true, as I am his.

Vacation

A seasoned married friend of mine recently told me that vacation adds strain on a marriage. It is a stressful time, of quick decision-making and temporarily staying outside of your comfort zone. We have certainly experienced this strain recently, and come out victorious. We had a few intense spats along the way but we were reminded that "my spouse is not the enemy." We are on the same team! I often misunderstand my husband's choice of words as an intentional assault on me. Many times, he is expressing his frustration about a circumstance that is beyond his control. Very often, his frustration seems to be directed towards me because he is a hot-blooded Italian man with a loud voice. I need to remind him gently that he is elevating his voice at the wrong person, just as he often reminds me to speak up. I truly believe that we are meant to have dissonance in our marriage. it is a musical term defined by Merriam-Webster to be: a mingling of discordant sounds; especially :  a clashing or unresolved musical interval or chord. When these same discordant sounds are submitted to the Master Conductor, He can lead them to sound harmonious together. We have found this to be true in our marriage. Much of what we do together comes out very well, when we are following Jesus, our Master Conductor!
We do have a lot of fun together on vacation. I've always loved our adventures together, just he and I. We are creating new memories with our boys now. During his time off, I was reminded to lovingly submit, to be forgiving when his decisions fail, and to celebrate his leadership when they don't.

Daddy Moments

I find my husband irresistibly attractive with our little ones. It has made me fall in love with him all over again to watch him play with them and spend quality time with them!

My guys are too cool for school!

These Aarons melt my heart!

Life will be challenging but Daddy will help you keep climbing even when it's difficult!

Ephesians 5:22

                  "Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord." As I am learning each day to submit to the Lord, I pray that I might also be the wife He has called me to be, submitting also to my husband. My name is Darcie, and this is my handsome husband, Aaron. He is God's gift to me, a treasure that I try not to take for granted. So why a blog about submission? I would hope that those who read might be inspired to respect and cherish their husbands above all else, second only to Jesus Christ. I intend to share our adventures, our hard lessons, our parenting victories, and most of all, the great love that God has given us for each other, in hopes to bring Him glory.